There are many preconceived notions of what it means to be male or female. Often, we take it for granted that everyone is a “he” or a “she,” but the simple reality is that not everyone fits into these bipolar categories.
Most of us have heard of what it means to be transgender, but of the 20 students I asked, only one knew what it meant to be genderqueer: a person who doesn’t fit into the traditional two-gender system, but instead identifies somewhere in between the two genders, or as a completely different gender.
While it’s understandable that the term is not as widely known as homosexual or queer, it’s still ludicrous that so few people have been told or have come across the term genderqueer, especially since it’s a term that could potentially apply to so many.
In a way, most of us don’t fit into the constricting idea of binary genders. We may be females with certain masculine traits, or vice versa. Or maybe we have traits that are neither male nor female.
While we may not question our association with either gender, many of us have never been offered any other options. I know I often feel pressured to act a certain way because I am female, and I know these pressures must affect how I live my life. But what if this bipolar notion of gender didn’t exist?
Some people prefer to view gender as a spectrum, with male and female at either end. Still others, such as fifth-year art student Kale Likover, subscribe to the view that gender is socially constructed. They feel that even a spectrum is constricting because it ignores people who don’t feel they fit anywhere between the two conventional genders.
Likover, who has recently been going by Kale as opposed to her given name, Naomi, due to its perceived femininity, identifies as genderqueer.
“Gender for me is more fluid than the – I guess – average person. I would describe myself as a genderqueer trannie dyke boy.”
While Likover could have tried to redefine the name Naomi and challenge the femininity associated with it, Kale made it easier to occasionally pass as a male. “I don’t want an alias, because I’m still me.
“If gender construction was not so constrictive, then people would experiment more with their gender presentation and identity,” Likover said.
This is possibly the very goal of genderqueer expression.
As fifth-year American literature student Georgina Wakefield, former chair of QueerXGirl, put it, “The way gender is socialized is complicated and so prevalent that genderqueer can be empowering for many people because it allows them to challenge that pressure.”
Basically, genderqueer expression is about being who you want to be, not what society expects you to be. The term genderqueer gives you a word to associate with while not belonging to the convention of binary genders.
This can mean almost anything you want it to – from not having the conventional sexual orientation of your gender, to not feeling like you belong to your assumed gender, to not having a gender at all.
The idea of gender as fluid raises many issues, such as strictly male or female bathrooms and gender-restrictive pronouns.
“I think people who have ambiguous gender representation would have such an easier time if there was gender-neutral bathrooms,” expressed Likover, who currently uses female restrooms due in part to fear of being attacked in a male restroom.
Likover has also just begun to ask people not to use gender-specific pronouns. Instead of she/her and he/his, Likover prefers to use they/their or genderqueer pronouns such as ze/hir.
While this may seem like a lot of effort, it will become easier with time. It’s important to respect someone’s wishes regarding their own gender. Besides, these details are the first step in creating an all-inclusive society.
As the “guys” and the “girls” decide which fraternities and sororities to join, we must remember that not everyone fits into this binary gender system. In fact, probably very few of us feel 100 percent male or female. For those of you who do, that’s awesome – the system works for you.
But for those of you who call yourselves metro, tomboy or simply have no label for your gender, give a thought to genderqueer. Ideally, the term will encompass all people – strictly male or female being no more normal from being in between genders or completely outside gender conventions.
Just take a moment to think of all the times you’ve felt pressure to act a certain way because of your perceived gender. If you’re a girl, maybe you didn’t feel that it was right to speak up in class, major in science, or cut your hair short. Maybe you have battled or are battling an eating disorder.
If you’re a guy, maybe you still don’t feel right wanting to be a heterosexual fashion designer, or maybe you’re constantly pressured to be “big,” to play like a man and not a puny girl.
Genderqueer relieves these pressures. It completely removes these preconceived notions of gender, which, for me at least, is a great weight off my shoulders. So give it some serious thought, and maybe you’ll discover that inner “ze.”
Send your thoughts regarding gender and fluidity to Loewenstein at lloewenstein@media.ucla.edu. Send general comments to viewpoint@media.ucla.edu.
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